After writing about my sons birth, I knew it would only be fair to share the story of my daughters birth. I didn't want sharing their birth stories to be one of the things that, as the second child, she could hold it against me.
Being the second child myself, I am acutely aware of the differences of childhood memories between the first and second born, so I try my darnedest to duplicate everything for her as I did for him.
But lets be honest, I came across her Halloween footprints the other day. White feet on a black background, not spider webs, or happy Halloween scrawled on the canvas. But, I tried, and really the most important step is done, the feet.
Anyhow, so my daughters birth. First let me start off by saying that we didn't know what we were having for either pregnancy, but I should have known this pregnancy was a girl. I had different cravings, I was nauseous over food I loved, I was carrying different, I had migraines at the beginning and end, and she was a literal pain months, before she arrived.
Two months before I was due this little monkey decided to "play" in the birth canal. I remember vividly the day in January when I was barely able to walk around my school and classroom and debated asking my secretary for an elevator key. Coworkers even went as far as to say I looked like crap and asked if they were going to have to delivery a baby. Luckily by the next day she had "popped" back up where she should have been. I had no idea what was happening but thankfully my midwife did and was able to explain it to me. I thought at the time, that it was a good sign. Ben had come exactly a week early, so I was expecting this baby to come a week or more early, isn't that what they say about second babies?!
The "playing" became too much to tolerate so two weeks before my due date I was put off work. It was a leap year, I was put off before February 29th, I did not move on February 29! I sat on the couch and vegged as much as I could. March 1st I geared up for an early labor by eating and drinking all the things they say can bring on labor. On March 10th, exactly one week early, this Momma was Cranky with a capital C. What the heck was going on! why was this baby not making a move?! Why was my second baby arriving later then my first did.
Then March 11th came, Ben went to daycare, Ryan went to work, I picked up Ben from daycare, Ryan went out for a beer with a buddy after work and I started making Ben and I supper and then bang. It was 5:30 pm. I don't remember what was on the stove for supper that night, but I do remember thinking it was just "playing" again. I fed Ben and we were hanging out on the couch and the playing seemed to become a little more routine then usual. I downloaded a contraction app so I could start tracking these pains to see if there was a pattern. 10 minutes later I was texting Ryan saying "I know you said you would be home by 6:30, but I really think you should be home by 6:30" that prompted a bit of a reaction and he came barreling home.
Ryan called on his way home and said "call your parents to come get Ben", but they were supposed to be at a Moosehead hockey game... I was still using the contraction app and it was saying Head to the hospital soon, I thought the app was off, but I figured I would call my parents. SO low and behold, they didn't go to the game, they chose to run an errand to Home Depot instead. They were at the house by 6:45. At this point, my app was telling me to call an ambulance, so we called our midwife. She said to head in to the hospital and she would meet us there to check me.
We arrived at the hospital around 8:00 pm. The contractions were pretty strong, but I was able to talk and breathe through them. When Ryan dropped me off at the front door, I was trying to convince him to just drop me off and go park, he insisted on coming in to registration with me. I'm not sure if I was breathing through the contractions loudly, or what, but the registration lady peeked around the corner and had two nurses down in the elevator with a wheelchair before I knew what was happening. I said I could walk into the elevator, but they insisted I sit so we could get upstairs quicker. I am pretty sure I jolted out of that wheelchair as soon as I could, sitting in labor does not work for me.
I remember being checked and being told I was 6 cm. First thing to my mind then was great, I am less then I was when I came in for Ben. But she also told me that my "water" was bulging a lot and was likely going to break soon. Well from 8:00-9:54 I labored again drug free in any position that I could find temporary relief from. I remember crawling up the back of the bed when I told Ryan I couldn't do it anymore, he reminded me I said the same thing with Ben. I just kept telling myself that I just had to get to my water breaking. Not even two contractions later and my water exploded.
Thankfully, one of my midwives had told me that "sometimes with second babies, after your water breaks, it can cause a slip and slide for the baby in the birth canal." That is the best way I can describe it. I was literally crawling up the back of the bed and I could not flip over. They wanted me to flip over, until I told them I would be sitting on the babies head. They hadn't realized that her head was already out. One push, and there she was. Within seconds she was on my chest and crying and I was over the moon. I didn't get that experience with Ben because he didn't cry right away so they whisked him off to the NICU for 30 minutes.
Brin was snuggled in tight and it was probably a couple minutes later before we realized we didn't check to see if it was a boy or a girl. I think I always knew it was a girl, I just didn't want to tell myself that in case I was wrong. I should have known that she was going to be an independent girl when she came into the world as fast and furious as she did and on her own terms. How she delayed my post labor shower because she wouldn't stop nursing or the fact that she burst my eardrum during labor (which I wouldn't find out until a couple days later). There were early signs that she would be a fierce female.
You know what is great about a late night birth? You can't have any visitors until the next morning. We moved up to our room for the night and got to spend it quietly together while texting and calling those we wanted to spread the news to. Many of the phone calls were shocked responses as I had just talked to many earlier in the day saying "no sign of baby yet". We had a few visitors the next day, but were home in our own house by noon. You may hear that and think, wow did they kick you out? But no, they certainly did not. We chose to, and we were able to because we had the IWK midwives follow our births.
If you don't know much about midwives, please don't jump to conclusions or judgement. Look them up, research them, they are incredible. There was never one point throughout either of my pregnancies that I EVER questioned the care I was getting, I felt confident that I was being prepared for the birth. I was informed about all of the decisions I was able to make leading up to the birth and the care of my child after the birth. I was able to leave the hospital with Brinley before they had a chance to do her newborn blood work, because my midwife could do that at my house. My midwife also happened to warm a cloth and put it on Brin's foot before pricking her with the needle, this was not the experience Ben had in the hospital for the multiple foot pricks he had to have. I never felt rushed or had to wait for appointment times with my midwives. My midwives knew me, they knew Ryan, and they knew both of my kids well. When I see the midwives, that I saw frequently through the two pregnancies, they still know my name and give me hugs. The week after both births, they came to my house to check up on us. They do the usual check up for weight and measurements, etc. for the baby, and they do a physical and mental check up on the Momma. It's not always the same midwife that comes to see you, but they all know about you. Their breastfeeding knowledge honestly should be it's own post. With Ben they taught us how to tube feed when he wouldn't latch. They recognized that I couldn't tube feed on my own once Ryan went back to work, so they stayed one day for a very long time, until we could get Ben to latch with a nipple shield. They followed us for 6 weeks post delivery for both babies, and at both last appointments I was sad, I wish they could follow us for a lot longer then 6 weeks. These ladies know how pre-natal and post-natal care should be. They really shouldn't have to work as hard as they do to make society and politicians understand their benefit and their need to be part of maternal care. I digressed.
Brinley Rose, that is your birth story. You came into this world on your own terms, and you live your life everyday on your own terms. You are a strong, confident, and independent girl and I am so proud and honored to be given the duty of being your mom.
Being the second child myself, I am acutely aware of the differences of childhood memories between the first and second born, so I try my darnedest to duplicate everything for her as I did for him.
But lets be honest, I came across her Halloween footprints the other day. White feet on a black background, not spider webs, or happy Halloween scrawled on the canvas. But, I tried, and really the most important step is done, the feet.
Anyhow, so my daughters birth. First let me start off by saying that we didn't know what we were having for either pregnancy, but I should have known this pregnancy was a girl. I had different cravings, I was nauseous over food I loved, I was carrying different, I had migraines at the beginning and end, and she was a literal pain months, before she arrived.
Two months before I was due this little monkey decided to "play" in the birth canal. I remember vividly the day in January when I was barely able to walk around my school and classroom and debated asking my secretary for an elevator key. Coworkers even went as far as to say I looked like crap and asked if they were going to have to delivery a baby. Luckily by the next day she had "popped" back up where she should have been. I had no idea what was happening but thankfully my midwife did and was able to explain it to me. I thought at the time, that it was a good sign. Ben had come exactly a week early, so I was expecting this baby to come a week or more early, isn't that what they say about second babies?!
The "playing" became too much to tolerate so two weeks before my due date I was put off work. It was a leap year, I was put off before February 29th, I did not move on February 29! I sat on the couch and vegged as much as I could. March 1st I geared up for an early labor by eating and drinking all the things they say can bring on labor. On March 10th, exactly one week early, this Momma was Cranky with a capital C. What the heck was going on! why was this baby not making a move?! Why was my second baby arriving later then my first did.
Then March 11th came, Ben went to daycare, Ryan went to work, I picked up Ben from daycare, Ryan went out for a beer with a buddy after work and I started making Ben and I supper and then bang. It was 5:30 pm. I don't remember what was on the stove for supper that night, but I do remember thinking it was just "playing" again. I fed Ben and we were hanging out on the couch and the playing seemed to become a little more routine then usual. I downloaded a contraction app so I could start tracking these pains to see if there was a pattern. 10 minutes later I was texting Ryan saying "I know you said you would be home by 6:30, but I really think you should be home by 6:30" that prompted a bit of a reaction and he came barreling home.
Ryan called on his way home and said "call your parents to come get Ben", but they were supposed to be at a Moosehead hockey game... I was still using the contraction app and it was saying Head to the hospital soon, I thought the app was off, but I figured I would call my parents. SO low and behold, they didn't go to the game, they chose to run an errand to Home Depot instead. They were at the house by 6:45. At this point, my app was telling me to call an ambulance, so we called our midwife. She said to head in to the hospital and she would meet us there to check me.
We arrived at the hospital around 8:00 pm. The contractions were pretty strong, but I was able to talk and breathe through them. When Ryan dropped me off at the front door, I was trying to convince him to just drop me off and go park, he insisted on coming in to registration with me. I'm not sure if I was breathing through the contractions loudly, or what, but the registration lady peeked around the corner and had two nurses down in the elevator with a wheelchair before I knew what was happening. I said I could walk into the elevator, but they insisted I sit so we could get upstairs quicker. I am pretty sure I jolted out of that wheelchair as soon as I could, sitting in labor does not work for me.
I remember being checked and being told I was 6 cm. First thing to my mind then was great, I am less then I was when I came in for Ben. But she also told me that my "water" was bulging a lot and was likely going to break soon. Well from 8:00-9:54 I labored again drug free in any position that I could find temporary relief from. I remember crawling up the back of the bed when I told Ryan I couldn't do it anymore, he reminded me I said the same thing with Ben. I just kept telling myself that I just had to get to my water breaking. Not even two contractions later and my water exploded.
Thankfully, one of my midwives had told me that "sometimes with second babies, after your water breaks, it can cause a slip and slide for the baby in the birth canal." That is the best way I can describe it. I was literally crawling up the back of the bed and I could not flip over. They wanted me to flip over, until I told them I would be sitting on the babies head. They hadn't realized that her head was already out. One push, and there she was. Within seconds she was on my chest and crying and I was over the moon. I didn't get that experience with Ben because he didn't cry right away so they whisked him off to the NICU for 30 minutes.
Brin was snuggled in tight and it was probably a couple minutes later before we realized we didn't check to see if it was a boy or a girl. I think I always knew it was a girl, I just didn't want to tell myself that in case I was wrong. I should have known that she was going to be an independent girl when she came into the world as fast and furious as she did and on her own terms. How she delayed my post labor shower because she wouldn't stop nursing or the fact that she burst my eardrum during labor (which I wouldn't find out until a couple days later). There were early signs that she would be a fierce female.
You know what is great about a late night birth? You can't have any visitors until the next morning. We moved up to our room for the night and got to spend it quietly together while texting and calling those we wanted to spread the news to. Many of the phone calls were shocked responses as I had just talked to many earlier in the day saying "no sign of baby yet". We had a few visitors the next day, but were home in our own house by noon. You may hear that and think, wow did they kick you out? But no, they certainly did not. We chose to, and we were able to because we had the IWK midwives follow our births.
If you don't know much about midwives, please don't jump to conclusions or judgement. Look them up, research them, they are incredible. There was never one point throughout either of my pregnancies that I EVER questioned the care I was getting, I felt confident that I was being prepared for the birth. I was informed about all of the decisions I was able to make leading up to the birth and the care of my child after the birth. I was able to leave the hospital with Brinley before they had a chance to do her newborn blood work, because my midwife could do that at my house. My midwife also happened to warm a cloth and put it on Brin's foot before pricking her with the needle, this was not the experience Ben had in the hospital for the multiple foot pricks he had to have. I never felt rushed or had to wait for appointment times with my midwives. My midwives knew me, they knew Ryan, and they knew both of my kids well. When I see the midwives, that I saw frequently through the two pregnancies, they still know my name and give me hugs. The week after both births, they came to my house to check up on us. They do the usual check up for weight and measurements, etc. for the baby, and they do a physical and mental check up on the Momma. It's not always the same midwife that comes to see you, but they all know about you. Their breastfeeding knowledge honestly should be it's own post. With Ben they taught us how to tube feed when he wouldn't latch. They recognized that I couldn't tube feed on my own once Ryan went back to work, so they stayed one day for a very long time, until we could get Ben to latch with a nipple shield. They followed us for 6 weeks post delivery for both babies, and at both last appointments I was sad, I wish they could follow us for a lot longer then 6 weeks. These ladies know how pre-natal and post-natal care should be. They really shouldn't have to work as hard as they do to make society and politicians understand their benefit and their need to be part of maternal care. I digressed.
Brinley Rose, that is your birth story. You came into this world on your own terms, and you live your life everyday on your own terms. You are a strong, confident, and independent girl and I am so proud and honored to be given the duty of being your mom.
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